How I Found My Career Mojo Again After Divorce and Starting Over (Even After Years of Feeling Stuck)

For every woman who's ever wondered if it’s too late to start over — it’s not. Read that again.

I used to say I “didn’t work” during my marriage—but that’s not true.

I worked hard. I just didn’t get paid for it.

For 18 years, I ran a household, raised kids, managed moves every few years (thank you, military life), and supported a husband who was steadily climbing the ladder with his education and career.

My own work life? It came and went in short seasons—usually when I needed a break from being a stay-at-home mom and just wanted to talk to adults again.

I’d take a part-time job here and there. Nothing permanent—because moving every three years made that impossible. My main job, my entire identity, was being “the glue.” The one who made sure everyone else was okay.

And then one day, I wasn’t married anymore.

The Fall No One Prepares You For

Divorce is hard for anyone, but when you've spent nearly two decades prioritizing someone else’s dreams, it hits differently.

My ex walked away with his degrees, his job, his stability—and honestly, his freedom. And me? I had no savings, no career to fall back on, and no idea where to even start.

I had nothing, and to make matters worse, he knew it. He used that to his advantage, while I was stuck trying to figure out how to rebuild from the ground up with no support.

No network. No recent references. Just me and the quiet skills I had used for years to hold a family together.

It felt like I was starting ten steps behind everyone else. I wasn't just scared. I was exhausted. And somewhere deep down, I believed the lie that I wasn’t “hirable.”

What Shifted (Spoiler: It Wasn’t Glamorous)

One day, while scrolling through job listings and feeling completely defeated, I had a moment of clarity: I’ve done all of these things. Just not with a title or paycheck.

Managing a household? That’s logistics, scheduling, budgeting, conflict resolution, multitasking, time management. Planning a cross-country move with kids? That’s operations, relocation coordination, problem-solving under pressure.

It was like a lightbulb went off. I realized, I have been working all along.

That tiny shift in thinking gave me just enough courage to try.

The Messy Middle: Learning as I Went

Let me be honest—it didn’t happen overnight. I didn’t wake up the next morning full of confidence. What I did do was take one step:

I started writing down everything I’d done for my family and finding the professional version of those skills. I turned “managed household schedules” into “coordinated multi-person calendars and logistics.” I turned “budgeted for family of four on one income” into “developed and maintained monthly budgets under tight financial constraints.”

I took free online courses. I learned how to update my résumé. I practiced talking about myself without downplaying my worth. And eventually, I started applying for jobs that scared me a little—in the best way.

Yes, I got some rejections. Yes, I doubted myself. But every time I pushed past the fear, my self-worth got a little louder.

Now? You Can’t Tell Me Nothing.

Today, I walk into job interviews with my head held high. I know my work ethic. I know what I bring to the table. I know my worth—and I will not settle for less.

What changed? Not the world. Me.

I stopped seeing my past as a setback and started using it as evidence of what I can handle. I stopped apologizing for being “just” a mom and started showing up as a woman who’s capable, adaptable, and fiercely committed.

For the Woman Who’s Still in the Fog

If you’re in that place where it feels like everyone else has a head start and you’re still trying to figure out where to begin—this is your reminder:

✅ You are not behind.

✅ You are not too old.

✅ You are not out of options.

You are more capable than you even know.

Start by writing down everything you’ve done—even if you think it doesn’t count. It does.

Start small if you need to: one online course, one updated section of your résumé, one coffee chat with someone in the field you’re curious about.

You can build a new path from scratch. I know, because I did. And it didn’t happen with perfect timing or a magic opportunity—it happened because I showed up, scared but willing.

And now? I’m proud of the woman I’ve become. She’s steady. She’s resilient. She’s a damn good worker.

And she knows her worth.

You’ve got this. Even if your voice shakes. Even if it’s slow. Even if no one claps for you at first.

Your second act can be just as powerful as your first. Maybe even more so—because this time, it’s yours. ❤️

 🔧 Helpful Everyday Skills You Can Put on a Resume (You’ve done the work — now name it like a pro)

Instead of: “Took care of the kids full time”

• Try: “Managed daily operations and scheduling for multiple dependents; handled conflict resolution, academic support, and personal development coaching.”

Instead of: “Budgeted for the household”

• Try: “Oversaw and maintained monthly budgeting for multi-person household; reduced costs and maximized resource efficiency.”

Instead of: “Planned meals/grocery shopped”

• Try: “Created and executed weekly meal plans for family of [X]; optimized nutrition, budgeting, and time management.”

Instead of: “Drove kids to activities”

• Try: “Provided transportation logistics, time management, and calendar coordination across multiple external programs and appointments.”

Instead of: “Ran the house while partner worked”

• Try: “Led all aspects of home operations, including maintenance coordination, supply chain management (inventory/shopping), and team (family) morale.”

Instead of: “Volunteered at school/church”

• Try: “Organized and led community engagement events; developed leadership and project management experience through volunteer coordination.”

Takeaway: Your experience counts. Your time wasn’t wasted. And your next chapter? It’s yours to write.

Let’s be clear — you don’t have to “go back to who you were." You get to step forward as who you are now: Wiser. Stronger. More capable than ever.

So, pick up that pen or your laptop, dust off your confidence, and go get what’s yours.

The world’s been waiting. ❤️