“I’ll Call You Back” Doesn’t Mean What You Thought It Meant

I used to be that person. The one who genuinely believed that “I’ll call you back” meant later that day.

Maybe within an hour or two. Maybe even before bedtime.

I’d sit there waiting, checking my phone like it was on life support.

Fast forward to today? Yeah... no. I’ve learned.

When someone says “I’ll call you back”, it could mean anything.

But usually it means you won’t be hearing from them.

Not tonight.

Not tomorrow.

Maybe not even next week.

It’s like code for “This conversation is over and I’m being polite about it.”

Here’s how I now decode it:

• If they say “Hold on, I got someone on the other line” and it's silent, they just put you on silent and came back and say they will call you back. That call is done.
  

• If they’re giving short answers like “yeah… for sure… I got you” while sounding distracted? They already checked out. They will not be calling you back.
  

• If you pause talking and they don’t jump in or say anything after a few seconds? They’ve mentally left the conversation. They will not be calling you back.
  

• If there’s background noise and you hear them talking more to someone else than you? They’re about to hit you with the “I’ll call you right back” line. Spoiler: they won’t.
  

• If they suddenly sound rushed or overly eager to hang up? Yeah, don’t wait on that call back.

The truth is, “I’ll call you back” has become a soft exit.

A socially accepted way of saying goodbye without saying goodbye.

And honestly, I’ve started doing it too.

Not because I’m fake or mean, but because sometimes I just don’t have the energy to explain that I’m overwhelmed, tired, or over the conversation.

The wildest part?

Now when someone actually does call me back... I get irritated. Like, “Ugh, now I have to answer?” 

I prayed for consistency before and now I’m low-key mad when they actually DO call me back.

Funny how life flips on you.

But here’s something I realized.

We’re not upset about the calls.

We’re craving connection.

We want to feel like we matter.

Like someone thought about us enough to follow through.

So when people don’t call back, it feels like a little reminder that maybe we’re not as important to them as they are to us.

And that stings a bit.

But here’s the other side of that coin.

The people who are meant to call you back, the ones who value you, they will.

It might not always be an immediate call back.

But it will be soon.

So now, when I hear “I’ll call you back”, I just smile and keep living my life.

If they do, great.

If they don’t, also great.

I’m good either way, now.

Have you noticed these signs too? What do you do when someone says they’ll call you back?

Share your take.